1. image: Download

    dreamer7149:

gamzeemakarasober:

keepcalmbutpanicatthedisco:

missachickapea:

karkat-in-the-tardis:

dandelionpunx:

Whoever wants to eat cookie dough and not get salmonella. Here ya go!

lets be honest nobody ever thought ‘hmm i might get salmonella’ and stopped eating regular cookie dough like that just never crossed our minds

It always crosses my mind, but it never stops me. I just say silent chants to the chicken gods not to let me get sick from those raw eggs. lol

the chicken gods

bauuuccckkk- cakadoodledoooo

If I die from cookie dough I will accept my fate wholeheartedly

    dreamer7149:

    gamzeemakarasober:

    keepcalmbutpanicatthedisco:

    missachickapea:

    karkat-in-the-tardis:

    dandelionpunx:

    Whoever wants to eat cookie dough and not get salmonella. Here ya go!

    lets be honest nobody ever thought ‘hmm i might get salmonella’ and stopped eating regular cookie dough like that just never crossed our minds

    It always crosses my mind, but it never stops me. I just say silent chants to the chicken gods not to let me get sick from those raw eggs. lol

    the chicken gods

    bauuuccckkk- cakadoodledoooo

    If I die from cookie dough I will accept my fate wholeheartedly

     
  2. andrewfindsawesomethings:

    kelsey-annn:

    seagull-goddess:

    guacamolebeautyqueen:

    disneyfoodtravel:

    thegaynerdblog:

    Here’s the recipe since motherfuckers can’t source their shit.

    sweet baby jesus

    This changes everything

    okay so yes plz

    here ya go rhyder

    unless you’re boots-n-cats, you have no idea how aroused this makes me.

    (Source: wamwanfood)

     
  3. prettygirlfood:

4-Layer Pizza Dip with Homemade Flatbread
6 ounces ricotta cheese6 ounces finely shredded Italian cheese blend (I used provolone, mozzarella and Parmesan)3/4 cup pizza or marinara saucepepperoni slices to cover the top
Preheat oven to 350°.
Spread ricotta cheese in an even layer in a baking dish with high sides (for deep dish version it should be no more than 6-inches across approximately).
Pour pizza sauce over ricotta cheese and spread evenly. Layer shredded cheese over pizza sauce. Layer the top with the pepperoni slices. Bake for 30-35 minutes until cheese is browned and bubbly.
Piadina (Italian Flat Bread)

2 teaspoons instant yeast3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour2 teaspoons fine sea salt1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil1/2 teaspoon baking soda1 1/4 cup water

In the bowl of a stand mixer with paddle attachment, stir together the flour, yeast and salt.

In a small bowl, whisk together the water and baking soda, then add the olive oil. With the mixer on low, add the liquid to the flour mixture and stir to combine to make a firm moist dough.

Switch to the dough hook on your mixer, or on a lightly floured surface knead the dough until smooth, shiny and elastic (about 10 minutes by hand, or 5 minutes by dough hook on medium-low speed).

Put the dough in a clean bowl and cover with a dish towel to let rise until doubled in size, about 1 hour. Punch down or flatten the dough in the bowl and let it rest for 10 minutes.  While the dough is resting, start a cast iron skillet or griddle heating over medium-low heat for about 10 minutes until very hot, let it heat up slowly to avoid hot spots that will burn your flat bread.

Place the dough on a lightly floured work surface and divide it into 10 equal pieces. Roll each piece until about 5-6 inches across and roughly 1/2 inch thick. If the dough is still too stiff to roll, or pulls back, let it rest a couple of minutes before rolling.

Place one of the dough rounds in the hot pan and prick the dough in several places with a fork to prevent air bubbles. Cook the dough until golden brown on both sides, flipping several times while cooking. It will take about 4-5 minutes per round. Repeat with the remaining pieces until they are all cooked. You can keep the cooked rounds in a clean towel on a plate in a 200 degree oven to keep warm, stacking them on top of each other. This will help them stay soft as well. Serve warm or at room temperature.

Makes 10 round flat breads.

    prettygirlfood:

    4-Layer Pizza Dip with Homemade Flatbread

    6 ounces ricotta cheese
    6 ounces finely shredded Italian cheese blend (I used provolone, mozzarella and Parmesan)
    3/4 cup pizza or marinara sauce
    pepperoni slices to cover the top

    Preheat oven to 350°.

    Spread ricotta cheese in an even layer in a baking dish with high sides (for deep dish version it should be no more than 6-inches across approximately).

    Pour pizza sauce over ricotta cheese and spread evenly. Layer shredded cheese over pizza sauce. Layer the top with the pepperoni slices. Bake for 30-35 minutes until cheese is browned and bubbly.

    Piadina (Italian Flat Bread)
    2 teaspoons instant yeast
    3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
    2 teaspoons fine sea salt
    1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
    1/2 teaspoon baking soda
    1 1/4 cup water
    In the bowl of a stand mixer with paddle attachment, stir together the flour, yeast and salt.
    In a small bowl, whisk together the water and baking soda, then add the olive oil. With the mixer on low, add the liquid to the flour mixture and stir to combine to make a firm moist dough.
    Switch to the dough hook on your mixer, or on a lightly floured surface knead the dough until smooth, shiny and elastic (about 10 minutes by hand, or 5 minutes by dough hook on medium-low speed).
    Put the dough in a clean bowl and cover with a dish towel to let rise until doubled in size, about 1 hour. Punch down or flatten the dough in the bowl and let it rest for 10 minutes.  While the dough is resting, start a cast iron skillet or griddle heating over medium-low heat for about 10 minutes until very hot, let it heat up slowly to avoid hot spots that will burn your flat bread.
    Place the dough on a lightly floured work surface and divide it into 10 equal pieces. Roll each piece until about 5-6 inches across and roughly 1/2 inch thick. If the dough is still too stiff to roll, or pulls back, let it rest a couple of minutes before rolling.
    Place one of the dough rounds in the hot pan and prick the dough in several places with a fork to prevent air bubbles. Cook the dough until golden brown on both sides, flipping several times while cooking. It will take about 4-5 minutes per round. Repeat with the remaining pieces until they are all cooked. You can keep the cooked rounds in a clean towel on a plate in a 200 degree oven to keep warm, stacking them on top of each other. This will help them stay soft as well. Serve warm or at room temperature.
    Makes 10 round flat breads.
     
  4. image: Download

    foodforzombies:

Sweet Potato Soup with Citrus and Chipotle
Vegan, serves 1-2
Ingredients
1 cup mashed sweet potato (from a baked sweet potato - all sticky and sweet)
1/2 cup+ No-Chicken Broth (or substitute vegetable broth) — add more to thin out to desired consistency
1/2 cup soy milk*, original or plain or unsweetened flavors (I used Soy Dream)
*almond milk will work too
Add to taste (what I used):
orange or satsuma zest (a pinch)
salt (3 pinches)
chipotle powder (1/2 tsp)
Garnish:
1/4 cup diced avocado
2-3 tortilla chips, crushed (I used red, spicy jalapeno chips!)
dash of seasoned chili salt
+ Optional: nutritional yeast, canned white beans (blended in), cinnamon, black pepper, cayenne, lime juice (lime wedge served on side), parsley or chopped spinach served over top.
+ Lower sodium note: salt is very important for this recipe! It brings out all the flavors of the sweet potato base! If you need to go light on sodium, however, give lime or apple cider vinegar a try to perk things up..
Instructions
Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
Bake your sweet potato until tender.
Remove potato skin, add to blender along with the broth and non-dairy milk. Blend on low until smooth. Taste a drop to see that it is slightly bland at this point. Add the salt and spices to taste. I added the zest last and folded it into the poured soup.
Serve with garnish or avocado and crushed chips over top.

    foodforzombies:

    Sweet Potato Soup with Citrus and Chipotle

    Vegan, serves 1-2

    Ingredients

    • 1 cup mashed sweet potato (from a baked sweet potato - all sticky and sweet)
    • 1/2 cup+ No-Chicken Broth (or substitute vegetable broth) — add more to thin out to desired consistency
    • 1/2 cup soy milk*, original or plain or unsweetened flavors (I used Soy Dream)

    *almond milk will work too

    Add to taste (what I used):

    • orange or satsuma zest (a pinch)
    • salt (3 pinches)
    • chipotle powder (1/2 tsp)

    Garnish:

    • 1/4 cup diced avocado
    • 2-3 tortilla chips, crushed (I used red, spicy jalapeno chips!)
    • dash of seasoned chili salt

    + Optional: nutritional yeast, canned white beans (blended in), cinnamon, black pepper, cayenne, lime juice (lime wedge served on side), parsley or chopped spinach served over top.

    + Lower sodium note: salt is very important for this recipe! It brings out all the flavors of the sweet potato base! If you need to go light on sodium, however, give lime or apple cider vinegar a try to perk things up..

    Instructions

    1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
    2. Bake your sweet potato until tender.
    3. Remove potato skin, add to blender along with the broth and non-dairy milk. Blend on low until smooth. Taste a drop to see that it is slightly bland at this point. Add the salt and spices to taste. I added the zest last and folded it into the poured soup.
    4. Serve with garnish or avocado and crushed chips over top.
     
  5. I’m making Calzones for the Boys!

    libbyaavery:

    I have 1-2-3 Guys over playing as per usual a lengthy board game filled with lots of frustration and yelling.

    They already ripped through almost an entire red velvet cake today that I made (savages!)

    So I figured it was time to give them some sustenance. 

    I got the recipe for the crust from Here:http://cafeamy.blogspot.jp/2008/07/basic-calzone-dough.html

    but here’s my way of saving you the click.

    I love calzones. This is a very easy and delicious recipe. The dough comes out crispy and chewy at the same time. We fill ours with all sorts of stuff: BBQ sauce w/ chicken, cilantro, and beans; traditional pepperoni, olives, onions, and tomatoes; or an italian basil, parmesean, and ricotta. They all turn out wonderfully. For those of you unfamiliar with calzones, they’re an enclosed pizza, so maybe that will spark some ideas. 

    1 c lukewarm water
    2 1/4 t active dry yeast
    1 t salt
    1/2 t sugar
    3 c flour, plus extra for dusting
    1 T extra-virgin olive oil

    In a bowl, combine the water, yeast, salt and sugar, and stir to dissolve. Set aside for 15 minutes, then add the flour, and mix until smooth. Turn the dough out onto a floured work surface, and knead for 10 minutes, adding more flour if necessary. The dough should feel smooth and elastic. Lightly oil a bowl, and place dough inside. Let rise in a warm place until doubled in size, about 1 hour. Quarter the dough, and shape each piece into a ball. Cover, and let rise another 15 minutes. Makes enough dough for 4 calzones.

    Seal by crimping the edges of the dough with your fingers or the times of a fork. Brush calzone with an egg wash (1 egg beaten with 2 teasponns water). Trim the excess dough, make a small incision on the top, and bake until golden, 18 to 20 minutes.image

    I’m going with Garlic,spinach,ricotta,mozarella,basil,thyme,rosemary,tomato and chicken ( minus one because he’s a vegetarian) 

    The crust is currently rising, I’m effin’ starving.

     
  6. Blueberry Scones with Orange Glaze

    xo-marilynrose-xo:

    Ingredients:

    Scones
    -2 cups all-purpose flour
    -1 tablespoon baking powder
    -1/2 teaspoon salt
    -2 tablespoons sugar
    -5 tablespoons unsalted butter, cold, cut in chunks
    -1 cup fresh blueberries
    -1 cup heavy cream, plus more for brushing the scones

    Glaze
    -2 tablespoons unsalted butter
    -2 cups powdered sugar, sifted
    -2 oranges, juiced and zested

    Directions:

    Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

    Sift together the dry ingredients; the flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Using 2 forks or a pastry blender, cut in the butter to coat the pieces with the flour. The mixture should look like coarse crumbs. Fold the blueberries into the batter. Take care not to mash or bruise the blueberries because their strong color will bleed into the dough. Make a well in the center and pour in the heavy cream. Fold everything together just to incorporate; do not overwork the dough.

    Press the dough out on a lightly floured surface into a rectangle about 12 by 3 by 1 1/4 inches. Cut the rectangle in 1/2 then cut the pieces in 1/2 again, giving you 4 (3-inch) squares. Cut the squares in 1/2 on a diagonal to give you the classic triangle shape. Place the scones on an ungreased cookie sheet and brush the tops with a little heavy cream. Bake for 15 to 20 minutes until beautiful and brown. Let the scones cool a bit before you apply the glaze.

    You can make the lemon glaze in a double boiler, or for a simpler alternative, you can zap it in the microwave. Mix the lemon juice with the confectioners’ until dissolved in a heatproof bowl over a pot of simmering water for the double-boiler method, or in a microwave-safe bowl. Whisk in the butter and lemon zest. Either nuke the glaze for 30 seconds or continue whisking in the double boiler. Whisk the glaze to smooth out any lumps, then drizzle the glaze over the top of the scones. Let it set a minute before serving.

     
  7. victoryfood:

Lavender Lemonade
Lavender Lemonade[print recipe]inspired by Native Foods
4 tbsps (1/4 cup) culinary lavender*2 cups boiling water2/3 cup sugar1 1/2 cups fresh lemon juice (about 8 lemons)2 cups cold water
* Culinary lavender is lavender harvested for the purposes of cooking/eating. Please don’t buy the perfumed air-freshening kind because that is going to be utterly gross. If you want your lemonade to turn pink, you need to get the hidcote variety (that’s the only one that turns it pink).
Steep the lavender in 2 cups of boiling water for 15 minutes. Strain through a fine-mesh sieve and discard the lavender. Place the lavender tea and the sugar in a small saucepan and set over high heat, stirring until the sugar dissolves (you don’t have to put it over heat, but I do this because I’m impatient and want the sugar to dissolve faster and completely). Remove from heat and let cool to warm. Stir in the lemon juice. Stir in the cold water. Add more to taste. I prefer to keep mine on the concentrated side because I like to mix it with seltzer water when I serve it. Serve over ice. Makes about 6-8 cups depending on how dilute you want it.

    victoryfood:

    Lavender Lemonade

    Lavender Lemonade
    [print recipe]
    inspired by Native Foods

    4 tbsps (1/4 cup) culinary lavender*
    2 cups boiling water
    2/3 cup sugar
    1 1/2 cups fresh lemon juice (about 8 lemons)
    2 cups cold water

    * Culinary lavender is lavender harvested for the purposes of cooking/eating. Please don’t buy the perfumed air-freshening kind because that is going to be utterly gross. If you want your lemonade to turn pink, you need to get the hidcote variety (that’s the only one that turns it pink).

    Steep the lavender in 2 cups of boiling water for 15 minutes. Strain through a fine-mesh sieve and discard the lavender. Place the lavender tea and the sugar in a small saucepan and set over high heat, stirring until the sugar dissolves (you don’t have to put it over heat, but I do this because I’m impatient and want the sugar to dissolve faster and completely). Remove from heat and let cool to warm. Stir in the lemon juice. Stir in the cold water. Add more to taste. I prefer to keep mine on the concentrated side because I like to mix it with seltzer water when I serve it. Serve over ice. Makes about 6-8 cups depending on how dilute you want it.

     
  8. Dom’s (debatably) vegan Sweet’n’Spicy Wraps

    vicious-haiku:

    Ingredients:

    Tinned tomatoes

    Quorn fake chicken pieces (i never cook anything without fake chicken)

    Honey (some don’t consider it vegan, but thumbs up if you do. this recipe tastes kind of shit without honey)

    Cumin

    Coriander

    Cinnamon

    Chilli Powder (be careful, friend)

    Directions:


    Put all the ingredients in a pan on medium temperature with oil

    (Pick and choose with the Cumin, Coriander and Cinnamon, I had all three but I reckon it’d taste better with just two of them)

    Keep going until the quorn pieces seem edible

    Serve on Tortilla wraps

    image

     
  9. I’M IN THE MOOD FOR GLASS BOTTLES GODDAMNIT

    fuckingrecipes:

    AND HERBAL VINEGARS SEEM TO BE A NICE WAY TO SCRATCH THAT ITCH. 

    WHAT THE FUCK AM I TALKING ABOUT?

    THOSE FANCY-ASS BOTTLES WITH PLANTS ‘N SHIT ACTUALLY HAVE A USE, YOU KNOW! 

    image

    HOW THE FUCK COULD I MAKE SUCH A GORGEOUS WORK OF ART? 

    YOU MAY ASK YOURSELF THIS, BUT DON’T YOU DARE DOUBT YOURSELF, YOU BEAUTIFUL WARRIOR. 

    RIDE YOUR FAVORITE STAG INTO THE STARRY SKY, CHASING THE STAR YOU’VE WISHED YOUR DREAMS UPON. 

    GATHER 16 OUNCES (2 cups) OF WHITE, CIDER OR RED-WINE VINEGAR. IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER, SO COUNT YOURSELF LUCKY. 

    GRAB YOURSELF A BOTTLE. ANY KIND OF GLASS BOTTLE WILL DO, BUT ONE THAT HAS A CAP, OR AT LEAST A STOPPER IS DAMN NICE TO HAVE. TREAT YOURSELF, YOU DECADENT LITTLE SHIT!

    OLD WINE BOTTLES THAT USE A CORK (NOT A METAL TOP!) ARE EXQUISITE FOR THIS SHIT, AND MAKE YOU LOOK CLASSY AS FUCK. 

    GATHER YOUR HERBS. 

    PICK A COMBINATION THAT SOUNDS NICE! 

    MY FAVORITES ARE:

    • SCALLIONS AND THYME
    • ROSEMARY AND GARLIC
    • LEMON, CRANBERRIES AND ROSEMARY
    • BASIL, OREGANO AND SAGE
    • RASPBERRIES AND MINT

    IF YOU’RE USING GARLIC CLOVES, MAKE SURE YOU SKEWER THEM ON A TOOTHPICK, AND BE READY TO FISH THEM OUT TOMORROW.  YOU DON’T WANT TO LEAVE GARLIC IN YOUR HERBAL VINEGAR - IT OVERPOWERS THE TASTE QUICKLY, LIKE A DRAGON LEFT AMONG LAMBS. 

    READY FOR THE BOTTLING PART?

    PLACE YOUR VINEGAR INTO A POT, AND COAX THE FLAMES TO A LEVEL THAT COULD BE DESCRIBED BY WEAKLINGS AS ‘MEDIUM.’ 

    YOU WANT THIS SHIT TO SIMMER - STEAM A LOT AND MAKE TINY-ASS BUBBLES. IF IT REACHES A BOIL, YOU’VE FUCKED THINGS UP. 

    WHILE YOU’RE WAITING LIKE A PATIENT HUNTER, SHOVE YOUR HERBS INTO YOUR BOTTLE AND READY THE FUNNEL! 

    ONCE YOU SEE BUBBLES, REMOVE THAT SHIT FROM THE HEAT AND LET IT COOL UNTIL IT’S BACK TO ROOM TEMPERATURE.

    SO COOL THAT AVIATORS HAVE MATERIALIZED ON THE POT, AND ROCK METAL IS HUMMING THROUGH THE STOVE. 

    THAT STEP SHOULD TAKE ABOUT A HALF HOUR. 

    USE YOUR POURING SKILLS TO GET THAT VINEGAR INTO THE BOTTLE. 

    STOPPER IT AND SET IT IN A COOL, SHADY PLACE OVERNIGHT. 

    IF YOU PUT GARLIC IN THERE, FISH THAT SHIT OUT AFTER 24 HOURS. THE REST OF IT CAN STAY, AND AS LONG AS YOU KEEP STOPPERING THE BOTTLE WHEN IT’S NOT BEING USED, THAT SHIT CAN KEEP FOR YEARS. 

    WHAT CAN YOU USE IT FOR?

    SPLASH SOME OF THAT DELICIOUSNESS OVER ANY TYPE OF MEAT,  USE IT WITH YOUR ITALIAN DRESSING INSTEAD OF NORMAL VINEGAR, OR JUST SLAP THE FRUITY SHIT ALL OVER YOUR SALAD. 

    HOLY FUCK IT’S BEAUTIFUL AND USEFUL!

     
  10. DO YOU LIKE CONFUSING THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR TONGUE.

    fuckingrecipes:

    WELL READY THAT MEATY MUSCLE FOR SOMETHING AS BEWILDERING AS IT IS DELICIOUS. 

    THIS HERE IS RASPBERRY-MINT HOT CHOCOLATE. 

    YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT, THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I SAID. SOME PEOPLE MAY NOT LIKE THE FLAVOR COMBO, BUT THEY CAN RUN OFF WITH THEIR PLAIN HOT CHOCOLATE AND I WON’T GIVE A DAMN. ROLL WITH WHAT YOU LIKE, AND I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHIT. 

    IT TAKES SOME PREPARATION THOUGH, SO PREPARE YOUR BEAUTIFUL BUTT FOR BOARDING. 

    BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING ELSE, YOU’LL WANT TO RUN OVER TO THE ITALIAN SODA RECIPE AND MAKE SOME RASPBERRY SYRUP. THAT’S BERRIES, WATER AND SUGAR ALL ALCHEMIZED TOGETHER AND FUCK IT JUST READ THE DAMN RECIPE. 

    YOU WANT TO KNOW SOMETHING THAT’S AS BRILLIANT AS SHERLOCK’S HAPPY PUPPY FACE WHEN HIS HEDGEHOG PRAISES HIM?

    MINT SYRUP, THAT’S WHAT!

    IT’S THE SAME CONCEPT AS BERRY SYRUP, BUT YOU USE 1 CUP OF WATER, 1/2 CUP OF SUGAR AND 1/2 CUP OF FRESH MINT LEAVES. 

    SOME ASSHOLES MAY NEED TO BUY THAT SHIT, BUT I’VE GOT A CAR-SIZED PLOT OF LAND FOR GROWING MINT PLANTS, THAT’S HOW MUCH I FUCKING LOVE MINT. GODDAMN  DURING THE SUMMER I JUST CHEW THE LEAVES OFF THOSE FUCKERS. 

    BUT I DIGRESS. 

    TRY TO BE A CLASSY-ASS MOTHERFUCKER AND KEEP SOME TINY JARS AROUND TO STORE YOUR SYRUPS IN - THEY CAN BE ADDED TO FUCKING ANYTHING, AND TASTE AMAZING. 

    ICE CREAM, CAKES, MILK, FIZZY DRINKS, ALCOHOLIC DRINKS, JAZZ UP YOUR OATMEAL, FUCK, DIP YOUR DAMN TOAST IN IT. 

    WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF SYRUPS CAN I MAKE?

    GET CREATIVE, ASSHOLE!

    CITRUS? JUST CHOP UP THE WHOLE FRUIT AND TOSS IT INTO THE SUGAR WATER. 

    CINNAMON? SAME FUCKING RECIPE AS THE BERRIES, WITH 2 CINNAMON STICKS

    BERRIES ARE EASY AS FUCK

    VANILLA NEEDS AN EXTRA 1/2 CUP OF BROWN SUGAR THROWN INTO THE MIX, AND 3 TABLESPOONS OF VANILLA EXTRACT INSTEAD OF FRUIT. 

    HOLY TITS, YOU CAN EVEN COMBINE FLAVORS IN ONE POT, TO MAKE STRAWBERRY-VANILLA, OR LEMON-LIME! 

    HOME-MADE SYRUP IS AS PRICELESS AS SECRET MITHRIL ARMOR FERRETED AWAY FOR QUESTING. 

    ADD A TEASPOON OF MINT SYRUP, AND A TABLESPOON OF RASPBERRY SYRUP TO YOUR GLORIOUS HOT CHOCOLATE, AND YOU HAVE SOME FANTASTIC TASTE COMBOS IN THAT CONCOCTION. 

    The sweet, tart berry flavor mixing with dark chocolate, then changing to the smooth mixture of mint and chocolate, before the temperature fades completely and all that’s left is the crisp chill of peppermint lingering in my mouth.

    SOUNDS DELICIOUS AS FUCK, DOESN’T IT?

    I DON’T CARE IF IT’S THE MIDDLE OF SUMMER AT YOUR HOUSE, YOU GET YOUR ASS INSIDE AND MAKE SOME FLAVORFUL HOT CHOCOLATE!