1. cheat meal recipe

    plsfit:

    CHORIZO SLIDERS WITH AVOCADO CREAM SAUCE

    Ingredients:

    1/2 lb. Spanish chorizo, casing removed and coarsely chopped
    1 3/4 lb. Ground beef
    1/2 lb Bacon
    1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
    1 tbsp Smoked sweet paprika
    Kosher salt & freshly ground black pepper
    Extra-virgin olive oil, for drizzling
    1/2 lb Manchego cheese, shredded
    2 Avocados
    1 Lemon, juiced
    1 Large clove garlic, grated
    1/3 cup light cream
    12 Slider rolls
    Bibb lettuce leaves, for topping
    2 Plum tomatoes, sliced, for topping
    1 Small red onion, sliced for topping

    Directions:

    1. Heat a cast iron skillet or griddle over medium-high heat. Cook bacon until crispy and set aside. Place the chopped chorizo and ground beef in a bowl and season with Worcestershire, smoked paprika, salt and pepper. Add a drizzle of extra-virgin olive oil to the meat mixture and combine.

    2.Form 12 patties that are thinner at the center than the edges. Cook the sliders 3 minutes per side. Pile shredded cheese onto the burgers for the last minute of cook time to melt.

    3. Place the avocados in a food processor. Add the lemon juice, garlic and cream, and process until very smooth. Serve the sliders on rolls topped with lettuce, tomato, onion, bacon and avocado cream sauce.

    Recipe and image credit via The MeatHouse Blog.

     
  2. image: Download

    liahannah112:

Ingredients:
1/3 cup olive oil
3 Tablespoons red wine vinegar
2 Tablespoons capers
1 clove minced garlic
8 ounces fresh mozzarella
2 cups cherry tomatoes halved
1/2 cup chopped fresh basil
1/4 cup chopped fresh flat leaf parsley
1 box orecchiette (or any other tube pasta you have)
1/4 cup reserved cooking liquid
salt and pepper
1/3 cup roasted pine nuts
Parmesan cheese
Directions:
In a large bowl, combine the olive oil, vinegar, capers, and garlic. Season with salt and pepper.
Add the tomatoes and mozzarella.
Give a good toss. Let this marinate for 30 minutes if possible. I do this if I have time, if I don’t I do this while the water is boiling for the pasta.
Toss in the basil and parsley. I reserve a little for adding at the very end.
Cook the pasta in a pot of salted water.
Make sure to reserve at least 1/4 cup of the cooking liquid.
Add the pasta and the reserved pasta water. Toss well. Check for seasoning. Add salt and pepper as needed.
Sprinkle the reserved herbs on the top. Add the pine nuts and some Parmesan cheese.

    liahannah112:

    Ingredients:

    • 1/3 cup olive oil
    • 3 Tablespoons red wine vinegar
    • 2 Tablespoons capers
    • 1 clove minced garlic
    • 8 ounces fresh mozzarella
    • 2 cups cherry tomatoes halved
    • 1/2 cup chopped fresh basil
    • 1/4 cup chopped fresh flat leaf parsley
    • 1 box orecchiette (or any other tube pasta you have)
    • 1/4 cup reserved cooking liquid
    • salt and pepper
    • 1/3 cup roasted pine nuts
    • Parmesan cheese
    Directions:
    1. In a large bowl, combine the olive oil, vinegar, capers, and garlic. Season with salt and pepper.
    2. Add the tomatoes and mozzarella.
    3. Give a good toss. Let this marinate for 30 minutes if possible. I do this if I have time, if I don’t I do this while the water is boiling for the pasta.
    4. Toss in the basil and parsley. I reserve a little for adding at the very end.
    5. Cook the pasta in a pot of salted water.
    6. Make sure to reserve at least 1/4 cup of the cooking liquid.
    7. Add the pasta and the reserved pasta water. Toss well. Check for seasoning. Add salt and pepper as needed.
    8. Sprinkle the reserved herbs on the top. Add the pine nuts and some Parmesan cheese.
     
  3. liahannah112:



Ingredients:
3/4 pounds ground pork
3/4 pounds ground beef (80/20 or 85/15)
1/4 pound pancetta, small dice
1/2 cup parmesean, grated
3/4 cups breadcrumbs
1/4 cup parsley, finely chopped
1 tablespoon garlic, minced
1 teaspoon (each) red pepper flakes, ground coriander, ground cumin, caraway seeds (crushed), kosher salt, and ground pepper
2 eggs, lightly beaten
2/3 cups whole milk
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium onion, chopped
1/4 pound cremini mushrooms, quartered
1 tablespoon garlic, minced
1 large banana pepper, chopped
1 tablespoon sweet Hungarian paprika (1 heaping tbsp)
1/2 teaspoon hot or half-sharp paprika
1/4 teaspoon smoked paprika
1 teaspoon porcini mushroom powder
1/4 teaspoon (each) dried rosemary, thyme, crushed fennel seeds, and marjoram
1/4 cup parsley, finely chopped
1/2 cup dry white wine
15 oz stewed tomatoes, chopped, with juices
2 cups chicken broth
1/2 cup sour cream
Directions:
Preheat oven to 325 F. Lightly mix all ingredients for the meatballs except the olive oil together and form into balls 1-1 1/2 inches in diameter. (Depending on size, you should get between 20 and 30.) Allow time to refrigerate them so they firm up a bit.
In an oven-safe pan, brown the meatballs in olive oil on all sides. Remove to a plate, cover with foil, and set aside.
Add the chopped onion to the pan dripping and saute until starting to brown. Add mushroom and saute a few minutes more, until they start to brown as well. Add garlic and peppers and saute until fragrant, about 30 seconds, then add the paprikas, the porcini powder, and the rest of the herbs and spices. Cook, stirring, about a minute. Deglaze with wine. Cook until wine is mostly evaporated, then stir in tomatoes and their juices and the broth. Bring to a boil and return the meatballs to the pan.
Transfer the pan the oven and braise for 1 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally and luxuriating in the awesome aromas that should be enveloping your kitchen at this point.
When the braising time is up, remove the pan from the oven. Put the sour cream into a small bowl, then temper it by stirring in a few spoonfuls of the braising liquid. Stir the sour cream mixture back into the pan, coating the meatballs and heating through. Serve as an appetizer or with spaetzle or egg noodles for an entree.

    liahannah112:

    Ingredients:
    • 3/4 pounds ground pork
    • 3/4 pounds ground beef (80/20 or 85/15)
    • 1/4 pound pancetta, small dice
    • 1/2 cup parmesean, grated
    • 3/4 cups breadcrumbs
    • 1/4 cup parsley, finely chopped
    • tablespoon garlic, minced
    • teaspoon (each) red pepper flakes, ground coriander, ground cumin, caraway seeds (crushed), kosher salt, and ground pepper
    • eggs, lightly beaten
    • 2/3 cups whole milk
    • tablespoons olive oil
    • medium onion, chopped
    • 1/4 pound cremini mushrooms, quartered
    • tablespoon garlic, minced
    • large banana pepper, chopped
    • tablespoon sweet Hungarian paprika (1 heaping tbsp)
    • 1/2 teaspoon hot or half-sharp paprika
    • 1/4 teaspoon smoked paprika
    • teaspoon porcini mushroom powder
    • 1/4 teaspoon (each) dried rosemary, thyme, crushed fennel seeds, and marjoram
    • 1/4 cup parsley, finely chopped
    • 1/2 cup dry white wine
    • 15 oz stewed tomatoes, chopped, with juices
    • cups chicken broth
    • 1/2 cup sour cream
    Directions:
    1. Preheat oven to 325 F. Lightly mix all ingredients for the meatballs except the olive oil together and form into balls 1-1 1/2 inches in diameter. (Depending on size, you should get between 20 and 30.) Allow time to refrigerate them so they firm up a bit.
    2. In an oven-safe pan, brown the meatballs in olive oil on all sides. Remove to a plate, cover with foil, and set aside.
    3. Add the chopped onion to the pan dripping and saute until starting to brown. Add mushroom and saute a few minutes more, until they start to brown as well. Add garlic and peppers and saute until fragrant, about 30 seconds, then add the paprikas, the porcini powder, and the rest of the herbs and spices. Cook, stirring, about a minute. Deglaze with wine. Cook until wine is mostly evaporated, then stir in tomatoes and their juices and the broth. Bring to a boil and return the meatballs to the pan.
    4. Transfer the pan the oven and braise for 1 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally and luxuriating in the awesome aromas that should be enveloping your kitchen at this point.
    5. When the braising time is up, remove the pan from the oven. Put the sour cream into a small bowl, then temper it by stirring in a few spoonfuls of the braising liquid. Stir the sour cream mixture back into the pan, coating the meatballs and heating through. Serve as an appetizer or with spaetzle or egg noodles for an entree.

     
  4. koriru:

Orange chicken is a popular Chinese take-out dish. This easy orange chicken recipe takes 30 minutes to make and better than Panda Express’s orange chicken.Share with those friends who love chinese!!For the sauce:• 1/2 cup orange juice• 1 tbsp grated orange zest• 2 big garlic cloves• 1 tbsp oyster sauce (find in oriental section of store)• 2 tbsps rice vinegar• 2 tbsps soy sauce• 1 tsp minced ginger• A dash of honey, sugar or agaveFor the stir-fry:• 1 lb chicken tender cut into strips or TOFU drained well• 3 tbsp cornstarch• 4 cups chopped mushrooms, celery, carrots, snap peas and broccoli – must be fresh.• 1/2 cup chopped onion• 1 tbsp olive oil• salt and pepper to tasteDirections:1. Put all sauce ingredients in a blender. Blend and taste if you’d like to add sweetness to it.2. Pour sauce into pan and heat for 5 mins, then put in a separate bowl.3. Wash the pan. (Of course you can use more than 1 pan)4. Spice the chicken or tofu with salt & pepper.5. Add the cornstarch and rub the chicken with it.6. Boil the broccoli for about 5 mins, watch that it doesn’t get too soft, it stay firm. (Or micro till crisp tender)7. Place a paper towel on a plate and lay the chopped vegetables on it.8. Dry the pan.9. Cook the onion on olive oil and chicken for about 4 mins – make sure the chicken is cooked!10. Throw in the rest of the vegetables and stir-fry for 2 mins.11. Add drops of sauce between each stir.12. Repeat, adding a few tablespoons every 15 secs, for the sauce to cook down.13. Place the stir-fry over hot rice.

    koriru:


    Orange chicken is a popular Chinese take-out dish. This easy orange chicken recipe takes 30 minutes to make and better than Panda Express’s orange chicken.

    Share with those friends who love chinese!!

    For the sauce:
    • 1/2 cup orange juice
    • 1 tbsp grated orange zest
    • 2 big garlic cloves
    • 1 tbsp oyster sauce (find in oriental section of store)
    • 2 tbsps rice vinegar
    • 2 tbsps soy sauce
    • 1 tsp minced ginger
    • A dash of honey, sugar or agave

    For the stir-fry:
    • 1 lb chicken tender cut into strips or TOFU drained well
    • 3 tbsp cornstarch
    • 4 cups chopped mushrooms, celery, carrots, snap peas and broccoli – must be fresh.
    • 1/2 cup chopped onion
    • 1 tbsp olive oil
    • salt and pepper to taste

    Directions:
    1. Put all sauce ingredients in a blender. Blend and taste if you’d like to add sweetness to it.
    2. Pour sauce into pan and heat for 5 mins, then put in a separate bowl.
    3. Wash the pan. (Of course you can use more than 1 pan)
    4. Spice the chicken or tofu with salt & pepper.
    5. Add the cornstarch and rub the chicken with it.
    6. Boil the broccoli for about 5 mins, watch that it doesn’t get too soft, it stay firm. (Or micro till crisp tender)
    7. Place a paper towel on a plate and lay the chopped vegetables on it.
    8. Dry the pan.
    9. Cook the onion on olive oil and chicken for about 4 mins – make sure the chicken is cooked!
    10. Throw in the rest of the vegetables and stir-fry for 2 mins.
    11. Add drops of sauce between each stir.
    12. Repeat, adding a few tablespoons every 15 secs, for the sauce to cook down.
    13. Place the stir-fry over hot rice.


     
  5. image: Download

    nekotindiy:

CREAMY CHEDDAR POTATO SOUP
Ingredients
3 tablespoons of melted butter
1/2 cup of chopped onion
2 cups of water
2 cups of peeled and cubed potatoes
3 tablespoons of all-purpose flour
3 cups milk
2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
Instructions
Melt the butter in a saucepan and add the chopped onions. Saute until soft.
In a large stock pot, bring the water to a boil and add the potatoes, cooking them until they are just tender.
Darin the water, but keep 1 cup of it, setting it aside.
Stir in the melted butter and onion with the potatoes, add the flour.
Stir well. Add the reserved water and milk and bring to a simmer.
Add the shredded cheese a little at a time mixing it in well.
Simmer for 30 minutes, stirring frequently.

Add salt & pepper to taste.

    nekotindiy:

    CREAMY CHEDDAR POTATO SOUP

    Ingredients

    • 3 tablespoons of melted butter
    • 1/2 cup of chopped onion
    • 2 cups of water
    • 2 cups of peeled and cubed potatoes
    • 3 tablespoons of all-purpose flour
    • 3 cups milk
    • 2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese

    Instructions

    Melt the butter in a saucepan and add the chopped onions. Saute until soft.

    In a large stock pot, bring the water to a boil and add the potatoes, cooking them until they are just tender.

    Darin the water, but keep 1 cup of it, setting it aside.

    Stir in the melted butter and onion with the potatoes, add the flour.

    Stir well. Add the reserved water and milk and bring to a simmer.

    Add the shredded cheese a little at a time mixing it in well.

    Simmer for 30 minutes, stirring frequently.

    Add salt & pepper to taste.

     
  6. sweetsrsmitty:

Brisket & Brie Quesadillas with Mango Barbecue Sauce

Tacos or quesadillas loaded with sliced brisket, brie, monterrey Jack, and topped with a mango barbecue sauce.
Ingredients
Brisket
3 lb brisket
Salt
Ground black pepper
1 Tbsp chili powder
3 cloves garlic, minced
16 oz Dublin Dr. Pepper (made with real sugar)
Mango Barbecue Sauce
1 1/2 Tbsp olive oil
1 medium yellow onion, chopped (about 3/4 – 1 cup)
1 clove garlic, minced
1/2 cup ketchup
2 Tbsp lemon juice
1 1/2 Tbsp Worcestershire sauce
1 1/2 tsp Creole (spicy brown) mustard
Salt
Pepper
1/4 cup mango chutney (1/4 cup homemade or purchased)
Quesadillas
8 8-in flour tortillas
8 oz brie, thinly sliced
1 cup monterrey jack, shredded
olive oil or cooking spray, to brush tortillas
cilantro, for garnish (optional)
Instructions
To make the brisket: Rub the meat with salt, pepper, chili powder, and garlic.
Place brisket in the crockpot and pour the Dr. Pepper over the top.
Cook on low for 8 hours.
Remove from the crockpot and let rest for 15 minutes.
Slice against the grain (1/8-1/4 inch thick).
To make the barbecue sauce: Heat olive oil in a 2-qt sauce pan.
Saute onions for 5 minutes.
Add garlic and cook until fragrant.
Stir in the remaining ingredients and simmer for 5 minutes.
Transfer to a blender or food processor and run until smooth.
To assemble the quesadillas: Heat a griddle or large pan over medium-high.
Lay out the tortillas. Divide the meat, brie, and monterrey jack between the tortillas, placing the meat and cheese on half of the tortilla.
Top with a spoonful or two of barbecue sauce and fold the other half over.
Place on the heated grill (brushing the tortilla with oil or cooking spray will prevent sticking).
Cook until the bottom is crisp and flip over.
Remove from heat and cut into 2-3 wedges. Serve with extra barbecue sauce.

Notes
Yields: 8 servings

    sweetsrsmitty:

    Brisket & Brie Quesadillas with Mango Barbecue Sauce

    Tacos or quesadillas loaded with sliced brisket, brie, monterrey Jack, and topped with a mango barbecue sauce.

    Ingredients

    • Brisket
    • 3 lb brisket
    • Salt
    • Ground black pepper
    • 1 Tbsp chili powder
    • 3 cloves garlic, minced
    • 16 oz Dublin Dr. Pepper (made with real sugar)
    • Mango Barbecue Sauce
    • 1 1/2 Tbsp olive oil
    • 1 medium yellow onion, chopped (about 3/4 – 1 cup)
    • 1 clove garlic, minced
    • 1/2 cup ketchup
    • 2 Tbsp lemon juice
    • 1 1/2 Tbsp Worcestershire sauce
    • 1 1/2 tsp Creole (spicy brown) mustard
    • Salt
    • Pepper
    • 1/4 cup mango chutney (1/4 cup homemade or purchased)
    • Quesadillas
    • 8 8-in flour tortillas
    • 8 oz brie, thinly sliced
    • 1 cup monterrey jack, shredded
    • olive oil or cooking spray, to brush tortillas
    • cilantro, for garnish (optional)

    Instructions

    1. To make the brisket: Rub the meat with salt, pepper, chili powder, and garlic.
    2. Place brisket in the crockpot and pour the Dr. Pepper over the top.
    3. Cook on low for 8 hours.
    4. Remove from the crockpot and let rest for 15 minutes.
    5. Slice against the grain (1/8-1/4 inch thick).
    6. To make the barbecue sauce: Heat olive oil in a 2-qt sauce pan.
    7. Saute onions for 5 minutes.
    8. Add garlic and cook until fragrant.
    9. Stir in the remaining ingredients and simmer for 5 minutes.
    10. Transfer to a blender or food processor and run until smooth.
    11. To assemble the quesadillas: Heat a griddle or large pan over medium-high.
    12. Lay out the tortillas. Divide the meat, brie, and monterrey jack between the tortillas, placing the meat and cheese on half of the tortilla.
    13. Top with a spoonful or two of barbecue sauce and fold the other half over.
    14. Place on the heated grill (brushing the tortilla with oil or cooking spray will prevent sticking).
    15. Cook until the bottom is crisp and flip over.
    16. Remove from heat and cut into 2-3 wedges. Serve with extra barbecue sauce.

    Notes

    Yields: 8 servings

     
  7. ALRIGHT YOU YOUNG’INS, POOR-AS-FUCK BUT STILL MAJESTIC PARTY PEOPLE!

    fuckingrecipes:

    HERE ARE SOME MORE TIPS TO EAT FUCKING FANTASTIC FOOD ON A LOW BUDGET! 

    MAKE YOUR OWN MOTHERFUCKING BREAD

    EVEN IF YOU’RE NOT ONE OF THOSE NUMBER-LOVING ASSHOLES, BASIC STUFF SHOULD BE COMMON SENSE. LET ME LAY DOWN SOME FACTS AND YOU SIT BACK AND ENJOY THE MAGIC CARPET RIDE!

    A LOAF OF WHITE BREAD AT WALMART COSTS ~ $1.50

    THAT SHIT’S FULL OF WEIRD BULLSHIT AND PRESERVATIVES AND REALLY DOESN’T TASTE LIKE ANYTHING. 

    A 25-LB POUND OF FLOUR COSTS $11

    A BOTTLE OF YEASTS COSTS $5

    A 10-LB BAG OF SUGAR COSTS $6

    THAT SHIT ADDS UP TO $22! PROBABLY EVEN LESS, BECAUSE I ROUNDED ALL THE PRICES UP!

    YOU KNOW HOW MUCH BREAD THAT MAKES? MAYBE YOU CAN DO THAT OFF THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD, BUT I HAD TO USE A DRAGONSBLOOD FOUNTAIN PEN AND PARCHMENT. 

    1 cup = ~5oz

    25lb = 400 oz

    25lb of flour = 80 cups

    ~4 cups of flour per large loaf = 20 loaves

    THAT’S 20 HOME-MADE, WARM, FLUFFY, PERFECTLY CRUSTED, HEALTHY AS FUCK LOAVES OF BREAD, FOR LESS THAN 22 DOLLARS!

    THATS $1.10 PER LOAF!

    THAT PRICE WILL DECREASE IN THE FUTURE, SINCE YOU ALREADY HAVE THE YEAST AND THAT SHIT LASTS FOR FUCKING EVER! (REMEMBER TO REFRIGERATE, THOUGH! WE DON’T WANT THOSE LITTLE BASTARDS TO START PARTYING WITHOUT PERMISSION)

    YOU KNOW HOW EASY BREAD IS TO MAKE?

    FUCKING EASY!

    NOT ONLY IS IT FUCKING EASY, BUT YOU CAN SHOVE SHIT IN THERE LIKE YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE!

    WANT A SWEET, FRUITY BREAD? MASH UP SOME RASPBERRIES INTO IT, AND USE APPLE JUICE INSTEAD OF WATER! JESUS FUCK THAT’S SO EASY I COULD VOMIT RAINBOWS.

    WANT A DESSERT-LIKE BREAD? ADD SOME CHOCOLATE CHIPS! ROLL THE DOUGH OUT AND SMEAR SOME PEANUT BUTTER INSIDE, THEN ROLL IT BACK UP BEFORE DROP-KICKING IT INTO THE OVEN. 

    HOLY FUCK, JUST LAST WEEK I THREW SOME MINCED GARLIC INSIDE, AND SPRINKLED GARLIC ON TOP BEFORE BAKING, AND MY BREAD TURNED OUT TO BE THE MOST DELECTABLE GARLIC BREAD I’VE EVER SHOVED IN MY FACE!

    IT’S CHEAPER AND HEALTHIER FOR YOU TO MAKE YOUR OWN GODDAMN BREAD. 

    GLUTEN INTOLERANT PEOPLE? USE FUCKING RICE FLOUR! GLUTEN JUST GIVES THE YEAST SOME EXTRA SHIT TO EAT. REPLACE THEIR FOOD SOURCE WITH SUGAR AND MAYBE OLIVE OIL OR BUTTER, AND THEY’RE HAPPY LITTLE FUCKERS. 

    I THINK IT’S A BIT DULL IN FLAVOR, SO ADD SOME OTHER SHIT LIKE FRUIT OR GARLIC OR HELL I DON’T KNOW MAYBE YOU LOVE NUTELLA. 

    ~~~~

    POTATOES ARE QUEEN. PRAISE HER. WORSHIP HER. 

    ALL YOU ASSHOLES SAYING ‘I AM A POTATO’ BETTER CHEER THE FUCK UP, BECAUSE POTATOES ARE SO RAD MY HEAD EXPLODES TRYING TO INTAKE ALL OF THEIR MAJESTY. 

    YOU CAN’T LIVE OFF POTATOES ALONE, BUT YOU CAN COME DAMN CLOSE!

    POTATOES ARE FUCKING CHEAP, AND RIDICULOUSLY EASY TO COOK!

    BOIL ‘EM, MASH ‘EM, STICK ‘EM IN A STEW. YOU CAN ROAST, BROIL, IF THERE’S A METHOD OF COOKING, YOU CAN BET YOUR ASS THERE’S A WAY TO COOK POTATOES THAT WAY. 

    APPLY HEAT UNTIL THEY’RE BROWNED, MUSHY, AND HAVEN’T STARTED TO BURN YET, AND YOU’RE SET. 

    IF YOU USE WATER TO COOK THEM, THEY WON’T TURN BROWN, JUST TEST HOW MUSHY AND COOKED-POTATO-LIKE THEY ARE IN YOUR MOUTH.

    TRUST ME, RAW POTATOES HAVE A CERTAIN TASTE.

    THEY AIN’T NASTY, THEY’RE PRECIOUS. 

    A 10-POUND BAG OF POTATOES COSTS $5

    FRUITS AND VEGGIES

    YOU THINK THIS IS A FUCKING GAME?

    BACK THE FUCK OFF MATE, EVEN YOUNG ASSHOLES WITH YOUR FOOD-DISPOSAL-LIKE INNARDS NEED SOME HEALTHY SHIT. PIZZA AND RAMEN ALONE WILL FUCK UP YOUR DIGESTION, AND WHEN YOU GET OLDER, YOU’LL BE LIKE “WHY THE HELL DID I DO THAT TO MYSELF?”

    PLUS, ASSHOLES THAT CAN COOK FANCY SHIT CAN LAUGH BEHIND THEIR HANDS ABOUT HOW CHEAP IT WAS TO MAKE, WHILE ALL YOUR FRIENDS ARE MARVELING ABOUT HOW FUCKING RICH YOU MUST BE TO AFFORD GORMET-LOOKING HOME-COOKED MEALS.

    LOOK FOR SEASONAL SHIT THAT’S ON SALE BECAUSE EVERYONE HAS WAY TOO GODDAMN MUCH OF IT!

    IT’S SUMMER WHERE I LIVE, SO FUCKING EVERYTHING IS HELLA CHEAPER THAN NORMAL. 

    MELONS ARE MASSIVE. SAVE THE UNEATEN PART IN PLASTIC WRAP. 

    INVEST IN SOME FOOD STORAGE CONTAINERS. 

    ZIPLOCK IS AWESOME. OFF-BRAND ZIPLOCK-LIKE THINGS ARE ALSO AWESOME. 

    YOU KNOW WHAT I DO EVERY NIGHT? I FIRE UP MY RICE MAKER, MAKE A 1/2 CUP OF RICE IN THAT BABY, AND ABOUT 2 MINUTES BEFORE THE RICE IS TOTALLY DONE, I THROW IN A PORTION OF THE LEFTOVER CRACK BEANS AND LET IT COOK ALONGSIDE THE RICE.

    THE RICE GETS ALL THE BACON TASTE AND THE MEAL JUST DOUBLED IN SIZE, HOLY FUCK! 

    GOT SOME NICELY-SAUCED CHICKEN? THROW IT IN WITH THE RICE!

    RICE CAN BE PART OF ANY GODDAMN MEAL YOU CAN THINK OF. 

    A RICE COOKER OR CROCK POT IS SERIOUSLY ONE OF THE BEST THINGS TO HAVE AS A POOR-ASS MOTHERFUCKER. 

    STEWS, FRIED OR BOILED ANYTHING, FUCK, I HEATED UP SOME PIZZA ROLLS IN MY RICE COOKER LAST MONTH. 

    (IF YOU COULDN’T TELL, I DON’T HAVE A OVEN OR MICROWAVE RIGHT NOW. MY RICE COOKER IS MY SALVATION. IT WAS A 25$ CHEAP-ASS THING, ON SALE FOR $17 BECAUSE THE PACKAGING WAS DAMAGED.) 

    SPEAKING OF DAMAGED PACKAGING, THERE ARE PLACES YOU CAN BUY SHIT AT 50 OR 75 PERCENT OFF JUST BECAUSE THE DAMN PACKAGING IS DAMAGED! EVERYTHING INSIDE IS STILL FUCKING PERFECT!

    EMBRACE THE SALVAGE STORE. 

    GIVE IT AN UNCOMFORTABLY LONG HUG TO SHOW YOUR GRATITUDE. 

    WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS? FUCK IF I KNOW. PROBABLY SOMETHING LIKE ‘RICE, BEANS AND POTATOES ARE RIDICULOUSLY INEXPENSIVE AND CAN BE MADE DELICIOUS.’ AND ‘MAKE YOUR OWN GODDAMN BREAD’ 

     
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    paleomushi:

Sausage Stuffed Eggplants - With Roasted Vegetables, Bacon and Kale and Watermelon Balsamic salad with Feta Cheese 
I was feeling extra uncreative today, and decided that I would at least be creative with dinner, and so I came up with this idea. Dinner today was really more of a kitchen sink dinner, where I just wanted to use up as much of the stuff I had in my fridge as possible. But just because it’s a clean up dinner doesn’t mean it can’t be different and creative and most importantly, amazing :D.
Stuffed Eggplants Ingredients
1 large eggplant
1 pound of hot Italian sausage, casing removed
2 tbsp chopped frozen spinach, thawed
3/4 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
2 tsp garlic powder 
2 tsp ground black pepper 
2 tbsp fresh chopped basil 
olive oil
paprika 
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F, line a cookie sheet with parchment paper. 
Cut the eggplant about 1 inch thick into rounds, then take a pairing knife and slide a cut down the centre, creating a pocket out of the eggplant rounds. 
Mix the sausage, cheese, garlic powder, pepper and basil together until mixed well. Take each eggplant round and stuff if full with the sausage mixture. 

They should look something like this when all stuffed. Drizzle the eggplants with olive oil and a sprinkle the top with some paprika. Bake in the oven for 45-50 minutes, until the meat is fully cooked. 
Balsamic Watermelon Salad with Feta Cheese
3 cups of chopped watermelon
2 tbsp fresh basil, chopped
1/4 cup feta cheese
3 tbsp balsamic vinegar
3 tbsp olive oil
pinch of salt
Mix all the ingredients together in a bowl, let sit for at least 10 minutes to allow the flavours to mingle and serve :)!
I still have a ton of watermelon cut up into cubes in my fridge, tomorrow I’m thinking watermelon soup…

    paleomushi:

    Sausage Stuffed Eggplants - With Roasted Vegetables, Bacon and Kale and Watermelon Balsamic salad with Feta Cheese 

    I was feeling extra uncreative today, and decided that I would at least be creative with dinner, and so I came up with this idea. Dinner today was really more of a kitchen sink dinner, where I just wanted to use up as much of the stuff I had in my fridge as possible. But just because it’s a clean up dinner doesn’t mean it can’t be different and creative and most importantly, amazing :D.

    Stuffed Eggplants Ingredients

    • 1 large eggplant
    • 1 pound of hot Italian sausage, casing removed
    • 2 tbsp chopped frozen spinach, thawed
    • 3/4 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
    • 2 tsp garlic powder 
    • 2 tsp ground black pepper 
    • 2 tbsp fresh chopped basil 
    • olive oil
    • paprika 

    Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F, line a cookie sheet with parchment paper. 

    Cut the eggplant about 1 inch thick into rounds, then take a pairing knife and slide a cut down the centre, creating a pocket out of the eggplant rounds. 

    Mix the sausage, cheese, garlic powder, pepper and basil together until mixed well. Take each eggplant round and stuff if full with the sausage mixture. 

    They should look something like this when all stuffed. Drizzle the eggplants with olive oil and a sprinkle the top with some paprika. Bake in the oven for 45-50 minutes, until the meat is fully cooked. 

    Balsamic Watermelon Salad with Feta Cheese

    • 3 cups of chopped watermelon
    • 2 tbsp fresh basil, chopped
    • 1/4 cup feta cheese
    • 3 tbsp balsamic vinegar
    • 3 tbsp olive oil
    • pinch of salt

    Mix all the ingredients together in a bowl, let sit for at least 10 minutes to allow the flavours to mingle and serve :)!

    I still have a ton of watermelon cut up into cubes in my fridge, tomorrow I’m thinking watermelon soup…

     
  9. image: Download

    thugkitchen:

Next time someone tells you to eat more veggies, get down on of these tiny motherfuckers. These low fat, high fiber sons of bitches are healthy as shit without sacrificing flavor. Trying to eat better? START WITH A FUCKING BURGER.
SMOKEY BEAN AND SPINACH SLIDERS 
2 cups chopped fresh spinach
1 cup chopped onion
3 cups cooked kidney beans or 2-15 ounce can
1/2 cup cooked brown rice (use leftovers)
4 cloves of garlic, chopped all small and shit
1 tablespoon liquid smoke (like I said, it is near the BBQ sauce at the store I swear. You haven’t even looked yet so stop complaining. It is there)
2 teaspoon soy sauce or tamari
1 tablespoon smoked paprika
2 teaspoons oregano
1 ½ teaspoons ground cumin         
black pepper to taste
1/2 cup whole wheat breadcrumbs (any breadcrumbs you have are fine. Got nothing? Just toast up some bread until it is almost burnt looking and real dry then grate them shits or put them in a food processor to get some tiny fucking crumbs. They help soak up all the liquid so don’t leave this shit out)
Warm the oven to 375 degrees and lightly grease a large baking sheet. You can throw down some foil and then grease it if you are a lazy fuck like me and hate doing dishes.
Add the spinach and onion to a food processor and pulse until they are in tiny-ass pieces. Add the kidney beans, rice, garlic, liquid smoke, soy sauce, and seasonings and pulse until everything is all mixed up. It’s fine if a few larger pieces of the beans hang around but you want this looking like kinda paste-like. Place the bean-spinach mixture into a medium bowl and add in the fucking breadcrumbs. This should be slightly sticky and hold nicely when you form it into a ball. If it is too wet, add more breadcrumbs. Taste it and add more spices and whatever until it tastes good to you. Can’t do that shit with ground beef.
No food processor? It’s all good. Just cut up the spinach and the onion extra tiny and add everything but breadcrumbs to a big bowl. Now pound on that shit until it looks like chunky mash potatoes. Then add the breadcrumbs and do all the other shit I say above.
Divide the mixture into 16 patties if you are making sliders or 8 patties if you are making regular burgers. Whateverthefuck you want to do. Place them on the baking sheet, spray them lightly with oil (slow your roll, I said LIGHTLY) and bake for 15 minutes or until the bottom is a crispy golden brown. Flip the patties and bake for 15 or until both sides look awesome. If you are doing full size burgers you might need to let the sides go 5 extra minutes. Let them cool for a few minutes before serving. Pile them high with red onion, avocado, whatever additional deliciousness you’ve got and chow the fuck down.
Makes 16 sliders or 8 regular patties

    thugkitchen:

    Next time someone tells you to eat more veggies, get down on of these tiny motherfuckers. These low fat, high fiber sons of bitches are healthy as shit without sacrificing flavor. Trying to eat better? START WITH A FUCKING BURGER.

    SMOKEY BEAN AND SPINACH SLIDERS

    2 cups chopped fresh spinach

    1 cup chopped onion

    3 cups cooked kidney beans or 2-15 ounce can

    1/2 cup cooked brown rice (use leftovers)

    4 cloves of garlic, chopped all small and shit

    1 tablespoon liquid smoke (like I said, it is near the BBQ sauce at the store I swear. You haven’t even looked yet so stop complaining. It is there)

    2 teaspoon soy sauce or tamari

    1 tablespoon smoked paprika

    2 teaspoons oregano

    1 ½ teaspoons ground cumin        

    black pepper to taste

    1/2 cup whole wheat breadcrumbs (any breadcrumbs you have are fine. Got nothing? Just toast up some bread until it is almost burnt looking and real dry then grate them shits or put them in a food processor to get some tiny fucking crumbs. They help soak up all the liquid so don’t leave this shit out)

    Warm the oven to 375 degrees and lightly grease a large baking sheet. You can throw down some foil and then grease it if you are a lazy fuck like me and hate doing dishes.

    Add the spinach and onion to a food processor and pulse until they are in tiny-ass pieces. Add the kidney beans, rice, garlic, liquid smoke, soy sauce, and seasonings and pulse until everything is all mixed up. It’s fine if a few larger pieces of the beans hang around but you want this looking like kinda paste-like. Place the bean-spinach mixture into a medium bowl and add in the fucking breadcrumbs. This should be slightly sticky and hold nicely when you form it into a ball. If it is too wet, add more breadcrumbs. Taste it and add more spices and whatever until it tastes good to you. Can’t do that shit with ground beef.

    No food processor? It’s all good. Just cut up the spinach and the onion extra tiny and add everything but breadcrumbs to a big bowl. Now pound on that shit until it looks like chunky mash potatoes. Then add the breadcrumbs and do all the other shit I say above.

    Divide the mixture into 16 patties if you are making sliders or 8 patties if you are making regular burgers. Whateverthefuck you want to do. Place them on the baking sheet, spray them lightly with oil (slow your roll, I said LIGHTLY) and bake for 15 minutes or until the bottom is a crispy golden brown. Flip the patties and bake for 15 or until both sides look awesome. If you are doing full size burgers you might need to let the sides go 5 extra minutes. Let them cool for a few minutes before serving. Pile them high with red onion, avocado, whatever additional deliciousness you’ve got and chow the fuck down.

    Makes 16 sliders or 8 regular patties

     
  10. image: Download

    wishuponafleetingtrain:

Chicken Lettuce Tacos with Cilantro Lime Cauliflower “Rice”
Ingredients:
Chicken Lettuce Tacos
1LB of Ground Chicken
Taco Seasoning (I used crushed chili pepper, oregano, onion powder)
Romain Lettuce Hearts
White Onion
Shredded Cabbage
Avocado
Salsa (I highly recommend Casa Sanchez Fresh Roasted Medium Salsa, only 5 ingredients and sea salt is the last item) 
On medium high heat, add a bit of olive oil to a frying pan with 1/2 small white onion diced and saute for about a minute or two. Then, take your ground chicken and add it to the pan in pieces and allow it to simmer. Sprinkle 1-2 tablespoons of seasoning and toss it with a spatula. Add 3 tablespoons of water to avoid drying out the meat. Stir every so often until the chicken is white and the juices run clear. Take a lettuce heart and cut off the stem and separate into pieces. Wash and then divide them. Layer the chicken, shredded cabbage, some left over white onion, sliced avocado, and salsa. 
Cilantro Lime Cauliflower “Rice”
Cauliflower
2 Cloves of Garlic
Fresh Cilantro
Limes
Olive oil
Add cauliflower florets to a food processor and pulse until it looks like the consistency of rice/couscous. Add a fistful of freshly chopped cilantro to the food processor and pulse it a few more times until evenly distributed in the cauliflower. Put about 1/2 tablespoon of olive oil to a frying pan on medium-high with two diced cloves of garlic and saute for about a minute. Add the cauliflower cilantro mixture to the pan. After a couple minutes of stirring the “rice” with a spatula, remove from heat and add the juice of one lime. 
OKAY, THIS WAS THE MOST DELICIOUS MEAL I HAVE EVER CREATED. SO FRESH SO CLEAN AND SO FREAKING EASY!!! HOPE YA’LL LIKE IT AS MUCH AS I DID!

    wishuponafleetingtrain:

    Chicken Lettuce Tacos with Cilantro Lime Cauliflower “Rice”

    Ingredients:

    Chicken Lettuce Tacos

    1LB of Ground Chicken

    Taco Seasoning (I used crushed chili pepper, oregano, onion powder)

    Romain Lettuce Hearts

    White Onion

    Shredded Cabbage

    Avocado

    Salsa (I highly recommend Casa Sanchez Fresh Roasted Medium Salsa, only 5 ingredients and sea salt is the last item) 

    On medium high heat, add a bit of olive oil to a frying pan with 1/2 small white onion diced and saute for about a minute or two. Then, take your ground chicken and add it to the pan in pieces and allow it to simmer. Sprinkle 1-2 tablespoons of seasoning and toss it with a spatula. Add 3 tablespoons of water to avoid drying out the meat. Stir every so often until the chicken is white and the juices run clear. Take a lettuce heart and cut off the stem and separate into pieces. Wash and then divide them. Layer the chicken, shredded cabbage, some left over white onion, sliced avocado, and salsa. 

    Cilantro Lime Cauliflower “Rice”

    Cauliflower

    2 Cloves of Garlic

    Fresh Cilantro

    Limes

    Olive oil

    Add cauliflower florets to a food processor and pulse until it looks like the consistency of rice/couscous. Add a fistful of freshly chopped cilantro to the food processor and pulse it a few more times until evenly distributed in the cauliflower. Put about 1/2 tablespoon of olive oil to a frying pan on medium-high with two diced cloves of garlic and saute for about a minute. Add the cauliflower cilantro mixture to the pan. After a couple minutes of stirring the “rice” with a spatula, remove from heat and add the juice of one lime. 

    OKAY, THIS WAS THE MOST DELICIOUS MEAL I HAVE EVER CREATED. SO FRESH SO CLEAN AND SO FREAKING EASY!!! HOPE YA’LL LIKE IT AS MUCH AS I DID!